First thoughts: paper review

I am peer reviewing a colleague's draft of Project 3, and my first reaction is that this draft is well worked already.  It seems like he has put a lot of effort in to this draft and has probably revised already.  He introduces his topic gradually but also clearly. Immediately, the author goes into using different sorts of rhetoric like rhetorical questions and similes.

First Thoughts...

I've been thinking about my own draft for Project 3, and I have to tell you (Prof Lay) that I think I want to rewrite most of it.  It's not that it  was horrible, but I think that it's less organized and fluid than I would like.  Usually, I have to rework most of my drafts several times to achieve the kind of writing that I want to put out to the world.  I don't know exactly what else to say, but I think this project was more difficult than I initially expected.  It's hard to find that middle ground where it's not too much description but also it gives the reader a clear and clean image.

"Coney Island State of Mind"

In this video, one can really feel the viewers connection to Coney Island.  Coney Island is the one place they feel at home above all other places in the world; however, it also is a place that they miss and dream of in its past condition.  It really feels like they grew up their.  This can especially be seen in the way that the speaker talks about Coney Island with a slight sadness to their voice but still having fond feelings for the place.

Presentation Response

The Endless Possibilities of Digital Text
The argument of this presentation was that there is a huge amount of options and uses for text that are only multiplying as time progresses.

changing technologies improves textual expression and understanding presentation

This presentation was very centered upon the history of writing and felt like it was taking you along a timeline.  While this is affective, I think that it would have been helpful if the group explained what they defined "revolutionary" and "improved".

Home

Home is like a little piece of heaven.  Home is the one place in the world a person can go and be completely comfortable.  Whether its a physical house, a dorm room, or a writing classroom, homes vary depending upon who's it is.  Home is more of a feeling than a place.  It's the feeling of being happy, healthy, and comfortable all at once.  It can even be another person with which one feels safe.  It's an oasis of sorts away from your problems where you can forget about your troubles and be at peace.

Visual Media in the Eyes of Jay David Bolter

"In one sense the goal of representation has been transparent presentation.  The medium is supposed to function as a window through which the viewer can see the objects represented. ... On the other hand, artists and their audiences do not always want the medium to disappear; they often want to be made conscious of and even surrounded by media.  Instead of transparency, they strive for hypermediacy, an intense awareness of and even reveling in the medium" (25).

This quote by Bolter discusses the main goals behind representations and their connection to the viewer.  He argues at first that media brings its viewers directly to the source and what is being represented; however, he then explains that people often aim for the opposite, wanting to be engrossed in the media entirely.  Initially, one can see Bolter's first point in the use of Powerpoint.  It brings its viewers straight to the information. But, when one looks closer, he or she can see people get drawn into it and it becomes more interactive with what it is presenting.  Powerpoints use that sense of hypermediacy to create a situation so as to entrance the audience in what they are watching and learning, leaving them to revel in the medium through hypertext.  In one sense, powerpoint as a medium is very straightforward and acknowledges its limitations in terms of creative ability.  On the other hand, it does allow the writer to move through text in non-linear way.

Hypertext makes reading more natural [presentation 2]

This group elaborated their thesis of Hypertext making reading more natural through many examples.  They used good vocabulary and verbs to convey their message.  In the actual presentation they could have explained more about certain things, but during the question and answer period they answered all questions asked thoroughly.

The Nature of Hypertext Presentation

The presentation today on the Natural appeal of Hypertext was by far one of the more informing and easy to follow presentations thus far from Bolter's books.  While there were a few points that were a bit unclear, they gave a large amount of examples and made the presentation easy to follow.  Afterwards, when asked questions, they were able to explain what had been misunderstood, which made their presentation even better.

Don't be afraid to write

Are you ever afraid to write?  Do you take writing so seriously as Jacques Derrida?

For me, I am not nearly as afraid to write as Jacques Derrida seems to be.  He takes writing much more serious than I do. While I do agree there are certain times in which writing is supposed to be serious, I think there is also a time where it can be more relaxed and easy.  Not everything has to be extremely serious all the time.

The New Technology of Writing

The New Technology of Writing: Bolter, Chapter 2 Presentation on Writing as a New Technology

Presentation Response

The Endless Possibilities of Digital Text
The argument of this presentation was that there is a huge amount of options and uses for text that are only multiplying as time progresses.

Speak with Authority

How does the poem "Like You Know" by Taylor Mali differ in its two recensions?  What reading does spoken word (orality) privilege? What does the textual writing space (unconventional as it is) play in the transmission of the meaning?

The two different presentations of the poem impact the reader differently.  While the oral poem with he video feed of him allows the viewer to see the emotion in his face, it comes across somewhat less clear.  The textual writing space version of the poem really emphasizes the meaning of all the words.  Seeing the poem in words as one is reading it allows them to have an even more involved experience.  It allows people to understand which words are being stressed with importance against the others through the different font sizes, fonts, and italicized words.  While the viewer may not become as connected to the actual author in the textual format, he or she will connect more with the meaning and importance of what is actually being said.

Chapter 6- Diction

John R. Trimble discusses the topic of diction in Chapter 6 of Writing with Style.  He poses many important questions and reasons about the use of words and vocabulary in writing today.  In Trimble's eyes, "A skilled writer writes as if she were paid a dime for each word she deletes."  A person can use some of the most original and interesting words; however, if it does not help their writing, it's nothing more than wasted words.  Writing should be concise so that the reader understands what is being presented to them and does not get lost along the way.  I agree with this idea because a truly gifted writer can write confidently while not over-using words.